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As this is a series it may be easier to understand how I arrived here by reading the previous parts first, starting with :

A Universe is Born – A Dimensional Upgrade

Another part and so close together, what is going on! This is a definitive new chapter so this time, I will start from the beginning rather then wait too long and forget alot of it! I will start with something more recent that inspired me to get writing.

I have been battling with the awareness of ‘at distance’ for years now and I have never been able to fully understand it. Basic concepts of ‘separation’ just don’t touch it, this is beyond the mental.. I can FEEL it, sense it, this is not simply ‘belief in separation’.

This year I managed to energetically see it, a space between me and me that was a short distance over to one side. I could feel the gap between us of ‘nothing’ no sense, no awareness. It was like a part of me couldnt understand why it (the gap) was even there, or how it came to be there.

I started to go over everything I could sense starting with the ‘TF’ that was with me. The energy and presence of my multi flame group soul that remains within me always due to merging. Also the human physical self TF that is ‘at physical distance’. So I initially assumed this is what it was relating to.

However, this never seemed to ‘do the trick’. It hung around getting more and more pronounced week by week.

Tarot was throwing the card ‘8 Swords’ at me over and over to the point where I was just frustrated. Then starting to get angry. Along with 3 Swords and 5 Wands.

‘Stop telling me I am missing something when I KNOW I am missing something! I am asking you what that is!’ Was a common response.

It would get to the point where this space around me felt hollow and took on a slight ‘ache’. It was like ‘negative space’. Not in a bad way but when something is removed to go into a negative state. Like temperature when we talk about -6C. Minus is maybe a better word for it. It started to get too much due to having been going on too long and the sensations getting stronger.

I KNEW there was something I was missing, not seeing. I was not being able to understand and it was just getting louder and louder. My inability to understand this situation/state I was sensing wore me down.

One day, (actually only a few days ago from typing this) I had this distinct feeling that there was something I could do today that would bring in my ‘Happiness House’. My grand master plan of what my life would be the state of. My tarot gave me some unexpected but exciting cards.

Magician – To build create, manifest, to see the unseen.

Temperance – To balance out, refine, alignment

10 Cups – My ‘Happiness House’ . My grand life plan.

‘Not much then!’ I wrote. ‘Dammit I would love to but what, or how?’. Tarot = 6 Wands – success, victory.

‘I am fully up for this! Bring it on!’

That night I had a dream.

I dreamt I had (somehow) managed to acquire my own 3-bedroom house in a foreign tropical country. Looking around it and found a community swimming pool in the back. I was excited and out exploring the town (all by myself this was which is an odd thing for an agorphobic to do). As I turned a street TF was there at the end. He was singing, but the music was everywhere.

As I walked toward him and turned right, he also turned right. He was walking parallel to me which made me laugh. I glanced over and he was still singing and would occasionally look at me. I would occasionally look at him and he drifted over to walk next to me. Still glancing at each other (and him still singing and looking very happy) he touched the back of his hand to mine.

As we walked we started to mirror little dancing moves together and I was SO glad I decided to walk out and explore by myself. I then turned to do a backwards summersault.. and I suddenly couldnt see anything, just this sense of rolling.

Next I am opening a door to a tiny traveler caravan and a little girl goes in (one of two girls). I am wondering, ‘where am I’, Where is TF’.. ‘Are these my daughters?’ . ‘Am I me, or am I TF now?’ ‘Am I both of us?’ I felt different, almost disorientated and I honestly didnt know which of us I was.

The next day something connected was mentioned on my discord server. It lead me down a line of enquiry that lead to a break through. The TF I sense with me, is me, not really connected to the physical guy. This is where I was getting stuck before. I was never able to really connect the energetic TF I knew with the human self. This ‘distance’ is what was ‘not right’ and I knew it.

On connecting this with the dream I realised the dream basically spelled out what the problem was. I had moved forward by myself on my path, gone out of my comfort zone to explore and come across this man whom I already knew I would run to (which I did). We started to walk a similar path, then closed together and became close and started to mirror each other. Then… We blended, merged and everything was thrown into confusion when I came out the other side.

I couldnt tell who I was anymore, I wasnt just me, I wasnt just Him, though neither was I both of us anymore. I was this third Other that seemed to be a blend of the two. Putting this together to realise, we had both merged with our Higher Self, thus from myself, from/of TF, I only sense the HS now. That ‘distance’ was created by my unawareness of what I was actually sensing of what had actually happened.

So I sat in an allowance and accept of this new information and as usual allowed for any further work to be done during the night. I wasnt disappointed!

I spent nearly 2 hours in a mass of awakenings, energy explosions, releasing, clear states and rising new awareness.

Energy pulses, colour explosions, tones and frequencies going off in my ears. Rising boughts of knowing and things that I had no idea what they were even about.

I laid there listening to a brief playing of ‘Are you Gonna go my Way?’ by Lenny Kravitz. A song I do not listen to, though it was playing for some reason in my room in the middle of the night, I assumed either TF was listening to it, or it was just how the energies were manifesting.

After that I decided to pass the time whilst waiting for this all to finish by using my new energy awareness upgrade to go through my energy and deal with the new imperfections I could now sense in new areas I wasnt even aware of before.

It all ended up an inner and above explosion. It was like the birth of the universe, stars flung out wide above my ‘inner head’ and a great sense of the 8th dimension pulsed out from it. I laid there for a while watching it until I fell asleep.

Nice dreams, I wish, some nightmares, remaining clearings I am guessing, however it goes to show how much a new understanding can create VAST and INTENSE changes.

My tarot gave me the next day for the last night activities: 2 Cups + 8 Swords + Justice.. how much more perfect could those cards be.. At this point I decided to have a few days break.

From this there were several more new perspectives triggering a merging. The illusion of ‘four’, Me (and the him in me) and Him (and the me in him) merging in perspective and energy into ‘two’. Me and Him. Followed after a few minutes write through this then triggered of the merging of those two. However, I have come across a block, the ‘gap’ between ‘me here’ and ‘me with him’. It was a massive energy block the size of a football and it sits just in front of my solar plexus.

I can still feel the dissolving and rise of the ‘two’, dissolving so they can come together, yet I am aware of this block also… oh! OH! unless that ‘me and me with him’ WAS the block! Ok I will work on that later!

Multi Flame Group Soul – A Long Term Theme

This theme has been around since my late 20’s. I have called it Collective Connection, Consciousness Cloud, Collective Consciousness would fit also. It has been in my Spiritual Recollected Information and memories and my progress up to date. Basically a same soul connection, with more than 2 in soul and/or person (was my guess).

Though the word ‘Group Soul’ (not to be confused with ‘Soul Group’) was only given to me in the last month, one night when HS or a Guide ‘slipped’ it into my mind. ‘Why not sooner?’ was my initial reply. If I had these two words earlier the understanding would of saved me a LOT of confusion! Namely soul connection confusion!

I KNEW there where many, I saw the truth in my heart, my ‘Many Loves’ heart awareness (multi flame group soul). Due to seeing a vision of three individual white energy beings rising up to merge before coming back down as a 3-coloured/sectioned individual. I have been seeing three energy beings together infront of me for years, seeing me with a three-coloured/sectioned energy field for years. Though I had no structure or outline with which to understand any of this.

A ‘Group Soul’ is basically a mass of individual souls operating as One soul. One being. Thus my confusion. Where was this ‘many’ I was always coming across actually coming from? Many people? Monadics? Multi-flames? Collective Consciousness? All where perfect feasible concepts that this would fit into. Yet nothing seemed to sink in and root. I didnt know the HOW, the state and form of which this was manifest, not until those two words came along. So multi flame group soul.

This explains my initial two ‘higher selves’ and the third that came along later Black, White and Red (as I called them as these were their respective main colours). My merging with each and how this never seem to be ‘completing’ what it should be.. if I where a general ‘split twin flame’ or even a Monadic.

Knowing this now.. is kind of late in the game. I have already worked with and through the Group Soul and embodied and aligned with it. My guess this was a requirement to do this and THEN learn what is is BEFORE finally realising I was in this fully merged Group Soul state BEFORE working further on the ‘TF’ joint part of the work.. Have we even begun that, I dont know anymore. I need time to process more.

This ‘many loves’ now make sense, they are the many, the ‘group’ that is the soul that make up each of us. All within each of us. That echo and resonation between us..no wonder I was so confused for so long!

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