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A Personal Exploration of Spirituality & Life

‘The Four of God’ – Prt 7

A long time coming (and ushered on by request) its time to attempt to write a catch-up of what has been going on in my personal connection experience. This is all my personal experience and based on over a decade of my own working and experience, over 70% of which is not written out anywhere.

As this is a series it may be easier to understand how I arrived here by reading the previous parts first, starting with :

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A Rising Sense of Hopelessness

As it sets in, your limbs start to feel heavy, like it is suddenly becoming a burden, this thing that no longer seems to serve any value. A sense of hopelessness starts to set in as an inward sigh of resignation sounds.

You know there is no point in doing it yet again, yet what else is there? There is a sense of duty, that even though you know its pointless, its what you need/should/have to do…. or even ‘might as well, its not like there is anything else’.

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Maze of Forgetfulness

‘You wont let go of you, because you fear him’…were the words that arose up from my sub conscious one morning. You…The last layer of self. Fear…the perception of trickery and deceit. Him…the new energy, space, victory of the Core and faith…Tarot is proving an extremely handy window when my writing isnt enough to start the journey into such arising. (more…)

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The I No Longer Exists

(This article ‘I no longer exists’ is infact a continuation of thought stream from the previous article)…

I am aware of what I perceive. Though that includes such as emotion and thought as part of the reality. I have been in other realities that have thought and emotion also though. So they do not solely exist in this reality, plane alone.

Maybe ‘physical’ emotion is that difference? Some emotion I feel is no longer physical but expressed differently or through a chakra as energy.

Breaking it Down

Me = Self/personality       I = Individual awareness/consciousness          ?

There is something about this ‘I’ that I am unsure of. It doesnt feel right. The sense of ‘I’.

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Becoming the Rainbow

Its dawning on me how I separate ‘here’ (the physical), the astral and what I consider ‘spiritual’ occurrences and the process of ascension.

I seem to keep looking ‘here’ for the results of the process that I perceive in the astral. Though what if what happens in the astral IS my spiritual/ascension results and growth? (more…)

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Higher Self, Self, I, Human. Letting go Ownership of Ascension

Me, myself and I.

I feel that state and energy around me today. The shuffling of being uncomfortable suddenly and needing to slightly re-adjust something. Like too tight jeans that are pinching.

This is following a feeling of searching a quick talk with my tarot and I realised that all my ‘work’ was never for me, the Self. I was made to be/do the work. You could even say ‘is’ the work. Either way, I accept it may never do anything for me, or have been for me to start with.

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