I can grow wings, fly, trans-locate, make things appear from thin air.
Sounds good eh?
Not really.
It has taken me literally decades (of the waking kind) to learn and grow to even get this far. Started a weak human, the fearful and feared ‘devil incarnate’ hunted and blamed for the misery constantly befalling the town. To a grudgingly accepted winged being in full self-acceptance of what she, just about in full mastery of her (current) talents, who is often asked for help when things go ‘south’ (usually the manifestation of negative energy), it has taken most my life to date to get here.
This is the decades long, constant, nightly world I go into.
Makes me question.. whats real here? Am I growing and changing things here, or in myself, whats growing, where?
(Last night, as usual, I am a 5D+ winged god-being living in the 3D world. I am the only one in my area of the country and everyone ELSE knows it. Trouble is.. living a 5D+ existence in a 3D world.. doesnt work.)
(I have no actual linear memory, I am not confined to a single place in space, as it is a linear 3D world which often leaves me in confusion as I try to follow it. I have no memory of what I was just doing most of the time. I am literally only in the moment.)
One moment I am on my way to a room in a building, then suddenly find myself sat 2 floors up reading some random book being asked why I am reading someone else book. ‘Oh.. thought it was mine’ I mumble, I was just walking up some stairs a second ago, how should I know why?
I managed to find my way back to the room. ‘Where did you go!’ I get in trouble for not following ‘oh.. I got lost..’. (Not like she would understand, even if she does know. Hell I dont even know what this building is or why I am even here. I am just following the prompts.)
Eventually, I had enough. I jump out the window, sprout blue wings and fly down the road. People in the many full windows buildings look up from their desks and prod their friends then point at me. Its not like I am something new, I have been flying around the town for years. (Though boy has the town changed. It used to be constantly in the midst of some manifested fear or crisis, people ready for the next wave of death and terror. Now, there is relative peace and I can fly without someone trying to shoot me down!)
(They just dont understand how HARD it is to live in their world. Last year I stopped being their saviour, I stopped saving them from their own manifesting fears. You can only do so for a while, they need to learn to do it themselves now than rely on me. I have taught them what I learned, told them what knowledge I have. I need to move on myself.)
Realising I probably wont even make it to the end of the street before I warp somewhere else, or wake up, I land on some grass and fold in my wings. My attention is drawn to some glowing purple minute flowers. Behind them a tiny tunnel, a fairy entrance. I lay down on the grass, curl up and cry.
……or is it a Dream?
This is what I feel like right now, in this human world. (Minus the perks of flying, instant creation and reality and matter manipulation, wings etc)
Just this internal sense of utter confusion that goes BEYOND the mind. I am existing in this other dimensional consciousness/existence whilst in a 3D world and its not working. My consciousness cant comprehend it anymore. Its darn right depressing.
Just kill me, or change me to the dimensional reality I am now resonating with or.. something.. PLEASE!
Written by Conscious Libre
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